Wednesday, April 09, 2008

90% is reality for me, 10% is mystery for you



We use to take this test in our Career development class or Psychology class to find out who you are...so this is who i am based on Carl Jung...


I want to know the truth and get down to the bottom of things. It’s an internal life, living in the head, theorizing constantly about how things work. I can link many thoughts and shoot off in multiple directions at once in an attempt to clarify and explain things really well or to try to represent the fullness of who I am and all the different things I can do and can’t do. I like to design—not just implementation but the stuff before that. There is a goal, a theme, and I start from that and work through the specifics one by one, keeping the whole thing integrated as I go, until I come up with “the elegant solution.” Often when I talk to people they only get from me a few steps—one, thirteen, a hundred. That’s all that gets verbalized, and what’s very clear to me either I’ve forgotten or find unnecessary to say out loud, which can come across as confusing at times.


I am very knowledge and big picture oriented. I want to bring everything that can be known into understanding a problem or situation. I enjoy working with those who think like I do but verbalize better. We can end up leaping forward rapidly and building off of ideas, asking questions with an answer in mind but wanting to verify things and learn more. If I am knowledgeable in that area, I always have something to add, to help better understand the idea and add something new. Although sometimes, even when I know we agree, people feel like I am trying to challenge them, which is frustrating because I am just doing it out of excitement. I try to understand all the variables and possible influences and then apply as broad a range of information as I can bring to the problem, to impact why the problem exists. I am interested in developing new skills and trying new ideas with those skills, and I am a good team member, and yet sometimes a little group work can go a long way. Most of all, I love to learn.


Central for me is honesty and integrity, especially intellectual integrity. If it’s not an honest approach to the issue at hand or to the relationship or organization, then it becomes an illusion—it only appears to have substance. I respect people who are genuine, honest, and open and doing what they are good at and what they enjoy and are up front about what is important to them.


I have a penchant for clarity. Some people say I’m hairsplitting, but there is value in precision.
I don’t like sloppy thinking, waste, and redundancy, and I am uncomfortable with sending out something that isn’t as good as it can be, but it has to go out anyway. I like things thought through. Incompetence just sets me right off. I have very little tolerance or patience, especially if the person is above me or isn’t really trying. I don’t think I push people any harder than I push myself and most people probably push less, which is where conflict comes in. Some people say my standard may be way out of whack and I assume the other person is competent. I like to avoid conflict at all possible costs, but if it reaches a point where I can’t go anywhere unless this gets resolved, then I will jump in and take care of it. That takes me a long time and I will go miles out my way to avoid that. It’s an ongoing decision between fairness and not letting people walk all over me.


There is this constant balancing act between self-confidence and questioning myself. Sometimes I feel secure and comfortable about knowing and thinking about and recognizing a lot and knowing how to learn new skills and ideas and concepts. But I have an almost instant ability to detect limitations—not knowing enough, picking out what’s missing, adding in an always-present feeling that it’s not quite right, and not knowing everything there is to know with insufficient time to learn everything that is important.
I can be seen as too unfeeling, too quick to start into work with not enough basis laid out for the day, and I’m not much for the personal amenities or socializing. Yet it is important that others are aware they are important to me. It’s not the first thing, but it’s in my awareness. I tend to try solving personal problems all by myself. Then sometimes I wind up without accurate information from others or about how it will affect others. I believe there must be an answer or a solution if I can just figure it out.


Wanna know who you are?

go to http://www.mypersonality.com/
then find detailed explanation of your personality type in: http://bestfittype.com/


Monday, April 07, 2008

What's your purpose in this life?






What's the purpose of your life? Do you know your destiny? When will we discover? and if we have discovered it, how can you be sure that's from God and not from your own desire?

This post is just my train of thoughts. This is too great a topic for a simple brain of mine. And i'm at the moment too much awake from excessive laughter with Rey. So this i need to deplete my brain's power haha. ok ok serious again now *put on serious face*

God has a purpose for each one of us, correct? so, what it is left for us to choose to discover it or not. Some of us feel compelled to draw ourselves nearer to the calling of our life. Some of us deny the calling with one reason or the other. I believe God has put in us a longing to do something, a passion to make something happened. To be a generation that makes a difference.

Newsweek Asia 1-2 years ago once said that the generation today is no longer generation that thinks about money but we are much more than that. We are the generation that wants to make a difference. Why younger people nowadays felt more and more drawn to do social work and volunteering? Does God has anything to do with it? Or is it just to soothe their aching conscience? We'll never know the motives behind self-sacrifice (time, emotion, money, etc) but one thing holds true: actions reflects the heart.

Some of us know early on what we long to do through things we like, asking around people who knows you best, trial and error. That may or may not be your calling. To make sure, all you need to do is simply to ask the Maker. He holds the manual of each of us. Btw, if any of you thinks that you are useless, remember that there is always a purpose behind each invention. We would think an inventor stupid if he said his creation serves no purpose. Small though it might be, an invention is there to serve a purpose. God is the Maker of the Universe, if He decide to create you and you are still breathing while reading this, you serve a purpose.

Always be reminded that our primary purpose in this earth is to please God. Our gifts and talents are there for a purpose, don't you think?

So, what if we found out about our calling and it's something we don't like? Will we run from our calling? or are we ready to take up the challenge. To be certain only of God and choose to make all our plans uncertain? It's up to us to choose. Do you want to live a life full of uncertainty but comes with 100% guarantee that the life you choose is the best life if you just let God holds the rein in your life? Or would you choose what you think is the safest path and one day you woke up asking why your life seems so purposeless?

Let me quote 2 paragraph from "God is my CEO" by Larry Julian in a chapter called "From Success to Significant"

Bob Buford believes in something he calls The Law of Unintended Consequences. He explains "People discover in business that you embark with a plan, and even though things often turn out very differently than you planned, they do have a way of turning out. If you never embark, they will never turn out. You have to be in the market in order to capitalize on the upturn. If you are on the sidelines waiting to time your move perfectly, it will never happen. People pursue their calling in the same way. They say ' I will stay in my job now and someday I will pursue my dream'.

Bob understands how difficult it is for people to pursue their dreams, but he believes strongly that it's sometimes as simple as taking a leap of faith. " I choose to believe that it is God who speaks quietly within us," Bob says, "that it is He who put the question deep within. And when we discover the answer, He reveals the meaning He has chosen for us to enjoy; He unveils the goal he has been keeping for us all along. I love how Paul puts in it Ephesians 2: "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good work, which God prepared in advance for us to do."

Okay my brain is about to die liao. It's 3.30am already. So anyone get anything? or am i just increase anyone's confusion :) oh well whatever it is, i'm happy to get everything i want out in writing. Maybe one day i might need to read my own writing to set myself straight + be amazed of how smart i am to write in good english...(not singlish). Me.....A true narcist....


Isaiah 30:19-21 " O People of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more. How gracious He will be when you cry for help! As soon as He hears He will andswer you. Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Wheather you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind, saying, "This is the way, walk in it"

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Mourning


My 3rd Granduncle just passed away this afternoon at 5pm. Although we are not very closed, he was always the happy-go-lucky granduncle who likes to buy presents for all his grandkids and grandniece/nephew. For some reason, i don't feel very sad but i'm pretty worried about my greatgrandma. She has to see all her sons passed away before her. I just hope she stay healthy after this. She's the biggest reason why i decide to go back for good.

This afternoon my boss questioned me about my career and he might help me if i do have a possibility to stay in China but i have given my final answer to walk away from the corporate life though there might be a possibility to make me a permanent staff in citi (who knows) lots of people might think me dumb huh. I'm just happy that my boss understand me so well to know i might not be suitable for this kind of life. A part of me would be very happy to stay here but the thought of my greatgrandma really tipped all the weigh off. So no more question huh.

Tomorrow i would have to pick up Suity from the airport and i guess she was not aware of her uncle's death. Mom called me 4 hours ago and said she hasn't told Suity yet and mom cried. Haih this is their supposed to be holiday but i don't think the rest of the holiday will be as beautiful as planned.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

2 Years of absence




I was looking through this blog and realized having a blog actually has it's own positive side - i could refresh what happened to me before. I haven't blog for a year ( my other blog is not active anymore i think ...the xanga one)

I'm almost at the end of my journey here in Shanghai. Having the best place to work, the best boss, the best colleagues, the best place to live...everything i never imagine could happened but it's time to get back to reality. New things are waiting for me back home.
I will miss walking around at night without worrying about my safety. Will miss having my friends' house all very near by. This is my final stop or should i say my final playground. everything will be much more serious back home.

Anyway here's a piece of Xintiandi's billboard captured in my mobile. looks like a piece of art huh. The family is coming here this saturday. Mom, Bro, Grandma, Tity and Suity. I got 2 days leave + permission to skip the operational review next saturday. I really do have a great understanding boss. Last week i was back from nothing to do atan to busy atan again. My 2nd boss, Veron, suddenly quit. Until today, i still don't understand what is happening but the fact is HR sent out her termination notice to the whole bank. I guess that's it, what were once my job comes back to me again. But now i'm more prepare with almost a year knowledge of what's going on in the department.

Last week i bought another mobile for myself out of impulsiveness...i guess i'm too fed up with sony ericsson. Me and Carlo went to search for his laptop in Xujiahui last sunday. We met up with Teddy since he's our technical guy. Carlo bought ASUS laptop for his wife and we were waiting for his laptop to be upgraded. So i ask Carlo to accompany me to look for a mobile. I ended up with a motorola (everyone is asking me what's the story with the switch from samsung to motorola) persuaded by Carlo and i guess the phone looks nice too so i bought it - just realized that my boss was working with Motorola before Citi. hahaha

I was contemplating to give my new phone to my brother. I thought he still uses the old nokia phone. He didn't want my phone...after i asked what phone he's using now, he's actually using a much better phone than the moto. chehhh!!! yeah that's my brother for you. Ok this posting is really wu liao. let's see how long i can keep posting again. Will try to get my flobber up and running again. Nitez

Sunday, August 28, 2005

What happened to me for a month?

Allow! bagaimana kabar atan hari ini yo!! excited and cant believe how fortunate i am!! hari ini diajak ama ubie ke JPCC. datengnya telat tapi pas mau masuk ke gerejanya ga boleh abis lagi Praise and Worship. U know who's playing?? HILLSONG UNITED AUSTRALIA!!! wow! gua cuma berdiri diluar aja bisa merinding denger nyanyiannya. 1 stadium penuh sekali orangnya. pas gua masuk tuh udah ga dapet tempat duduk so kita disuruh lesehan hehe. anyway abis hillsong united selesai, tiba waktunya kotbah kan. nah yang kotbah rupanya orang amrik. Sy Rogers dia converted homosexual. interesting banget hidup dia. dia cerita dari kecil napa dia jadi gay ampe di convert balik ama tuhan sendiri. baca sendiri deh kalo mau. ini website dia http://www.syrogers.com/ dia ada kasih liat foto2 dia pas dia jadi cewe pake baju cewe dan hidup sebagai cewe...CUANTIK YO!!!! pas dia nikah juga dia CAKEP!!! reyner kalah rey cantikmu. hahaha dia cerita kalo dia minta tanda dari tuhan kalo dia ga boleh buat operasi ganti kelamin. tau ga tuhan ngapain. 3 hari kemudian, John Hopkins surgery untuk ganti2 kelamin orang tuh tutup gara2 directornya bilang kalo research found that changing your sex is not the answer to the problem and it didnt help. so directornya tutup clinicnya haha gila yah. John hopkins yo! anyway yah kaget lah hari ini ketemu banyak unexpected stuff. troz pergi makan eh ada ari wibowo berjalan didepanku hahaha cakep cakep.

so, sedih juga minggu depan dah cabut ke shanghai. udah mulai deket ama anak2 tempat kerja eh harus pergi. rupanya orang2 kerja topic pembicaraannya rada "dangerous" huahuahuah tapi eyes opener lah. urusan rumah tangga orang bisa didiskusi ria gitu. kocak sih ketawa mulu. ada yang baru nikah dibabat abis2an. oh ya ada 2 orang yang lumayan gua respect disono. namanya pak michael ama bu linda. enak diskusi ttg christianity ke dia orang. pak michael lucu, dia nyanyi2 lagu true worshipper sepanjang jalan ke tempat makan, terus gua bilang pengen beli cdnya. eh dia bilang ntar ke cubicle dia nonton dvdnya dulu gih. nyampe kantor jadi nonton 1 lagu punya dvd. dilanjutin juga dia ok2 aja kayanya haha tapi ga enak banyak kerjaan. yang bu lydia mungkin gua respect dia gara2 dia mirip ama guru sd gua huahuahuaha baek banget ibunya. orang2nya di department itu kompak sih jadi enak ga bosen disono. biarpun kerjaan gua kadang2 rasanya pengen gua click "edit find" di microsoft hahaha biar lebih gampang daripada harus cari 1-1 lembar. efficiency! high efficiency with low bottle neck hahahaha that's my vocabs!

citibank lucu lho itu komputer2 semua ga ada disc slot ga ada disket slot ga ada usb drive semuanya di lock biar susahin kita data transfer jadi ga kecolongan data. tapi sih parah since i'm illegal worker, i dont have net connection lho, no email and everything. so, tiap kali mau transfer data harus bug my uncle untuk email ke orang2 yang gua bantu. serasa uncle gua jadi sekertaris gua. sedihnya yah! i think dia mungkin dah regret decision masukin gua ke citibank biarpun untuk kerja ga ampe 1 bulan hahaha. biarin lah. jadi tau banyak makanan2 aneh. masa ada siomay dalemnya otak2 coba. dri, lo pernah denger ga hahaha.

bbrp hari pertama gua di citibank, gua dikerjain ama orang2 sono. di bawa ke kafe debu. udah rada curiga sih ini namanya kafe debu ato beneran berdebu. terus udah turun lift keluar dari building, kita jalan di trotoar tros samping2 banyak jualan nasgor, mi goreng etc etc. eh tiba2 pak michaelnya bilang, "irene mau makan apa?" gua bengong bentar. OMIGOSH! this is the kafe man hahaha debu beneran. terus udah selesai shock pesen makanan di trotoar, gua jalan ampe tempat duduknya. nah yang ada cuma tempat duduk tanpa meja. troz gua tanya apa kita bakal bawa pulang tah. eh dia bilang "makan sini kok. ini duduk aja" LHO! makan tanpa meja huahauhauhuaha kocak kocak. i much prefer gua duduk di batu2 sih kalo harus makan tanpa meja. menyusahkan duduk di kursi dan harus pegang piring. jadi inget bloomie makan disamping UC basketball court haha ikan bakar pancingan pastur. nyum!

atan merakyat juga lho! naek bus umum, saudara saudara!! bawa laptop lagi. nekat sih yah tapi ya gpp lah daripada nyusain orang suruh jemput sana sini, drop sana sini. rasanya bebanin orang mulu. teros! atan membuat gosip dalem 3 minggu hahaha kacao sih. orang2 sono terlalu stress kali yah ampe menggosipi semua barang. sukur gua ga menerapi solution buat gosip2 yang gua dapet di bloomie. mengingat 4 hari lagi saya kerja hauhauhauha. wokie deh papai semuaaa ntar kalo ada yang lucu lagi gua bilangin lagi yahhh papaiii time for dinner! oh ya baru beli GMB baru True worshipper baru. bagus bagus!

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Keren!

aku dah di sg!!!! hore hore baru pulang 2 hari langsung london di bom. ancur sekali. sodaraku ampe diem di kantor ampe jam 12 malem. tapi saya sudah di sg!! harusnya pulang tanggal 10 tapi aku majuin sendiri jadi tanggal 5, jadi ga kena masalah deh pulangnya. oh ya pas di airportnya sendiri juga parah. aku dibilang kelebihan 20 kilo gara2 regulationnya dah beda dari US. jadi 2 bag harus total 30 kilo. aku ada 50 kilo dan harus bayar 20 kilo which is 700 pound. nah berapa itu 700 pound?? 1400 USD!!! uang darimana coba. orang uang sisa 100 USD hahaha. ya wes aku doa2 pokoknya aku pengen pulanggggg tanpa bayar apapun. eh pas ke customer repnya ngomong. orangnya bilang ya dah dikasih lewat kali ini. laen kali harus tau regulationnya. hooooraayyyyyy keren yo!

oh ya hari itu aku mau nulis blog soal hillsong. wuih itu gedungnya kan di theater. dia orang tuh monday to saturday it's a theater. kaya musical gitu. lagi maen We will rock younya Queens sekarang. tapi pas sunday itu tempat jadi gereja all day long. jam 11.30, jam 2 ama jam 6. nonstop. since dia kan theater, ya u know lah how good the sound system is. mengerikan man itu 1 theater di open door. lagunya dummmm dammm dummm ampe orang2 yang baru keluar dari tube (kereta bawah tanah)nya langsung nengok. very attracting attention sih lagunya. abis dipasang lagu christian rock gitu. pas PW lagunya ga tau semua tapi presence of Godnya woww!
John Bevere ngomongnya juga menarik sekali. sorry kalo sermonnya panjang sekali hahaha. mungkin rada ga connect2 dikit2 kalo kalian baca. tapi ya too bad lah yah. dia ngomongnya cepet sekali. pengen beli devotional dia. tapi ga beli karena kirain mo nitip kofu aja. rupanya cuma beda 1 dolar. gpp lah kofu rupanya bilang males bawa juga. ya wes ntar gimana lah pasti dapet (amin)!

oh ada yang lucu. kan 1 hari setelahnya aku nulis blog sermonnya john bevere. troz aku buka biblegateway.com untuk reference semua wordsnya. terus rupanya yang aku tulis ama yang harusnya tuh semua kaya beda either 1 pasal ato 10 pasal. jadi kaya aku tulis 149 tapi harusnya 139. harusnya 36 aku tulisnya 35. jadi aku harus baca2 pasal kan. nahhh yang aku tulis ituu (yang salah2 itu) tuh rupanya things yang klop ama barang2 yang aku lagi cari ato tanya. lucu yah. dikasih jawabannya gara2 salah denger sermon. tapi aku lumayan yakin bener lho dengernya. gpp lah seterahhh Tuhannnn mauMuu. pokoknya saya dapet jawabankoe!

pas 2 hari sebelon aku pulang dari UK, sodaraku tiba2 nanya semaleman ttg kristen. nanya perbedaan perbedaan ama agama2 laen. rupanya dia find kalo katolik tuh mengerikan. aneh yah aku lumayan kaget pas dia ngomong. abis mungkin buat aku dulu katolik tuh enak abis lenient haha. anyway dia tanya ttg jewish etc etc gara2 dia banyak tau ttg jewish tradition dari temen dia yang Jew. aku ga ngapa2in sih cuma kasih tau apa yang dia pengen tau aja. dia lumayan kaya state aku pas dulu lah. merasa budha paling enak abis paling netral ama peaceful aja keliatannya. mulai sekarang harus banyak2 hafal ayat. daridulu ga pernah afal. sedih banget. memory abis dimana ga tau. evaporates memoryku semua.

oh ya hari pertama aku nyampe di sg, sodaraku yang cowo yang jemput. ini adeknya sodara di london. yang cicinya marah2 gara2 adeknya ga pernah mau jemput dia tapi napa aku dijemput hahaha. saya cousin kesayangan dong *blush* hahaha. abis itu aku diajak makan pagi, cari kacamata baru, makan siang sushi berjalan di sushi tei, jalan2 nyari hadiah buat cewe yang kasih dia cuff link. sarap yo! jalan keliling singapore. puanasnyaaaaa 29 derajat. rasanya mau evaporate. abis itu dia ke embassy US gara2 visa F1 dia ditulis Female huahauhauhaa.dableQ ga dicek gitu. abis itu makan malem soba ama berbagai macem jamur diatasnya. NYUM!! sobanya di homemade. jadi ada tempat gelas bisa liat cooknya lagi buat sobanya. lagi nonton initial D. film baru starring jay chou, edison, shawn yu. lucuuuu bagusss aku suka! album baru jay september baru keluar. kayanya bakal nge-yesasia.com lagi deh di china. moh barang palsu yo!

hari ini mau keluar ama temenku. oh ya si reyner lagi stomach flu haha. kasiannn mana rumahnya jaoh sekali laghe. susah kesono. itu temenku lucu. suaranya berubah total jadi makin ngebas dari dulu. aku ampe nanyain identity dia lama sekali ampe bt dia. too bad lah sapa suruh berubah! ya wes update dari singapore

btw ada yang ngerti cara set up email content dari rumah untuk disend directly ke office fax ato msg di komputer office. pusing ga sih. pokoknya 2 tempat yang jauh dan device yang berbeda. cara connectnya gimana?

Monday, July 04, 2005

Fear of God

by: John Bevere

We are living in the last days and the last days are like Noah. What did Noah has that help him through the turmoil he faced? Intimacy with God

James 4:8 Come near to God and he will come near to you.
Who draw near first? Us! We initiate! We are the one who determine the level of our relationship with God. NOT GOD! we often thought that people like billy graham were borned with cross on their head. They were borned closed to God. No, they are just like everyone else, but the difference lies in their willingness to accept God's invitation to draw near. A lot of people who are passionate about God is not people who stand on the pulpit, they are ordinary people who accepted God's invitation to draw near.

Psalm 139:18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you.

When you love someone, you automatically think about them right? God's thoughts about us outnumber the grains of sand in the world. Imagine how many thoughts He has on each one of us. How he yearns for us and how he yearns for our fellowship with Him.

God says for us to pray without ceasing. What is praying? Praying is a two ways dialogue. If God tell us to pray without ceasing, God is willing to communicate with us without ceasing. How good is that? to be able to communicate with God every second everyday for the rest of your life.

The reason why people lack intimacy with God is because they don't have the foundation. What is the foundation? FEAR OF GOD.

Psalm 89:7 In the council of the holy ones God is greatly feared; he is more awesome than all who surround him.

When John Bevere went to Brazil for their National Conference back in 1996, the choir, praise and worship is incredible, but there's not even an ounce of God's presence in the room. why was that? he looked around andsaw people chattering among themselves, people looked around to their surrounding and didn't pay the attention to God. he was so upset that when it was his time to go up the stage, he stood silent for 45 minutes and and finally caught the attention of the audiences. He only asked two questions: if you want to talk with someone but the someone is talking with another person, will you talk to them? No. if you come knocking at someone's door and the reaction when they open the door is "oh, you again" will you come back? No. He told the room to repent and when they repent, God's presence come 3 times. The third time, the presence was so strong that the sound was as if a jet flew above the room. John said that it's not the daddy who visit, but the King who visit. The audience collapsed, weep and shouting. After that he went out of the stage and police that stood surrounding the stadium asked him in confusion what wind that comes from inside because they saw fire from the ventilation around the room.

2 presence of God: Omnipresence - I'll never leave you ...
John 14 Manifest presence - bring the unseen to the seen - Presence in the room

God won't come into a place where He's not held in utmost respect. The only way to get to God's presence is fear of God

God already teaches us about fear of God -> Matthew 6:9 "This, then, is how you should pray: " 'Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, ...

What's the Fear of God? Fear is not afraid. How can you be close when you are afraid of Him. Scared of God = you got something to hide, so the darkness in you is not exposed
Fear of God = scared to be away from God.

Fear of God :
Exodus 20:20 Moses said to the people, "Do not be afraid. God has come to test you, so that the fear of God will be with you to keep you from sinning."

It takes the love of God and the fear of God to keep us from sin.

Legalism Excess Disobedience

Love of God Fear of God

Fear of God : Reference Him, Love Him above everything else, Love what He loves, Hate what He hates.

Tremble in His word: to obey Him when it hurts, Obey when you don't see the benefit, Obey to completion, Obey when it doesn't make sense.

Psalm 25: 14 The LORD confides in those who fear him;he makes his covenant known to them.
Secrets of the Lord is with people who fear the Lord. All of us have secrets and only share it with close intimate friend. God is not everybody's friend. In the bible there's only 2 people who enjoy the intimacy of God. One of them is Abraham who obey God even when He was told to sacrifice his own son. Abraham obey and did the command on the next morning.

The dynamic of God and Abraham: God asked Abraham about demolishing Sodom and Gommorah. God valued Abraham's opinion and God's willing to do it after He listened to Abraham's suggestion. Abraham negotiated with God because there's his nephew Lot there. Remember that according to 2 Peter, Lot is a righteous person but he's as clueless as everyone else in Sodom and Gommorah that the city would be demolished. why? because though Lot is righteous, Lot does not fear God. Lot was saved by Abraham's prayer and God sent 2 angels to tell Lot.

You can be righteous, you can be holy, you can love God all your life but has no fear of God.

John 15:14 You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.

God will see you as servant until there's Fear of God in you and He will see you as friend. Why?
To protect you because we might get hurt because of the close relationship that we are not ready yet.

"you are My friend if you do whatever I command of you" God design everyone to be his close intimate friend but it is us who determine the level of relationship we want to have with Him.